Michelle & Barack Obama want their daughters to see them fail

Former first lady Michelle Obama says failure is one the most powerful things parents can show their children If there’s

Oct 21, 2025 0

Michelle & Barack Obama want their daughters to see them fail

Former first lady Michelle Obama says failure is one the most powerful things parents can show their children

If there’s one thing Michelle Obama is going to do, it’s be honest about what it means to grow and evolve.

The former first lady recently opened up about why parents shouldn’t shy away from letting their children see them fail, in a recent episode of the IMO podcast.

“Failure isn’t a bad thing for kids to see in their parents,” she told her brother and co-host Craig Robinson. “That’s something that Barack and I try to remember all the time. It’s seeing the vulnerability, seeing the fear. It gives, I’ve found, them permission to have those same emotions. Like, we think we’re being strong for our kids, we think we’re shielding them, but, when my girls perk up, it’s when we talk about failure.”

It’s a refreshing reminder from a woman whose family has been under the world’s microscope for nearly two decades. Michelle knows that, to the public and her daughters Malia, 27, and Sasha, 24, she and Barack might seem like they’ve always had it together. But as she explained on the podcast, that couldn’t be further from the truth.

“To see two parents who have succeeded at a certain level, we have to make it a point, right? Because they weren’t around when we were grinding, struggling, when he lost a congressional bid, when I failed the bar the first time, when we had an argument. They were too young for that,” she shared.

So now, she says, it’s on her and Barack to make sure their daughters understand that the path to success was never linear.

“It becomes even more important for us to take them down those emotional paths,” she added, noting that while her daughters have plenty of support, they also feel the internal pressure of expectation. “Watching someone fail and then bounce back from failure is a pivotal message.”

That message hits especially hard in a world where parents, especially Black parents, often feel pressure to appear put together as a means of shielding their kids from the harsh realities of life. But Michelle reminds us that strength doesn’t come from perfection, emphasizing her message in the podcast clip’s instagram caption: “Believe it or not, failing in front of your kids is one of the most important things you can do as a parent. In the right context and with the right conversation, it can become such a powerful teaching moment.”